Large Family - Why Do You Care So Much...

Why is it that some people always seem to have an opinion on the amount of children someone has or  feel they have the right to dictate to other people how many children they should have? I was watching a court case on TV where the judge asked the defendant how many children she had. When the defendant offered that she had four children the audience made gasping sounds like she had just confessed to committing a crime.  The judge then wanted to know how old she was to which the defendant responded “I’m 29.” The judge then said, “You’re done right? The factory is closed, right? I’m just saying, you have no business having four children at your age.” I was a little taken aback but curious as to where the judge was going with her line of questioning. Frankly I did not see how it related to the case, which by the way involved the plaintiff suing the defendant for damages to her car that she alleges the defendant's six-year old son scratched.  Turns out the 6-year old was playing outside unsupervised, which I could see why the judge would take issues with that. By the end of the case the judge determined that the plaintiff did not have a case because she had no physical evidence or a witness to support her case and the 6-year old denied doing the damage.  However before dismissing the case the judge gave the defendant a solid tongue scolding about her parenting style, her having four children, and strongly warned her about having anymore.

That’s not the only incident where I have observed a judge taking it upon themselves to offer/dish out family planning advice. This seems to be a trend with the more popular judge shows these days. But it also seems to be fast growing among main stream America.  When I tell people I have six grandchildren they look at me with a disbelieving expression. Mostly because I don’t look like the typical “grandma”, but more disbelieving when I say they are all through my daughter. Without even knowing anything about her they form an opinion about her and ask, “Are they all for the same person?” or “Is she done?” Sometimes I just want to ask them “Why do you care?” But instead I politely answer “Yes, they all have the same dad.” and “I don’t know, maybe.” Truth is it’s her decision whether or not she wants more children. I can offer her my personal opinion on the subject, but it is just that, my opinion.

There are lots of reasons why women end up with more than one or two children. Some by accident and some accidentally on purpose. Whatever the reason, there is no scientific data that supports that it is okay to dictate how many children a woman should have. Heck my grandmother had 11 children and in a time when there was no social welfare. All of them turned out pretty good. Among them she had a couple of doctors and a few very successful business entrepreneurs, who then in turn produced some successful off-springs. Not to go biblical on you, but in Genesis 1:28 it states, “And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion…” Besides, think about it, there are many families/heritages that became extinct because there was no one to carry on the family’s name/no heirs.  

While I don’t support the notion that women should have “a lot” of children just because they can, especially if they cannot support or take care of them, I do recall that this is a free country and while not advisable, people are free to have as many children as they so desire. I would hope that they are responsible enough to take into consideration the consequences of having a large family and the sacrifices and impact on each child as it relates to their individual needs. The more children someone has the more strain they place on their resources. It’s just that simple. As a result, various siblings in the family may suffer from the “middle child syndrome”, meaning they may feel left out or neglected as they compete for their parents’ attention. However, it is also very possible for them to all grow up in a loving nurturing home where their physical and emotional needs are met and they become productive members of society.  So if women have the physical and mental support they need to care for their children, then so be it. However that may not always be the case. 

There are times when children suffer emotional and physical abuse as a result of the stress involved in being in a large family but so do an only child. No one can predict when and how this will happen. I will always advocate for children, but this is not China – there is no law against having more than one child.  What do you care how many children someone decides to have anyway? It’s their business and you should respect that. I’m just saying – I got issues. What about you?)i(

© Copyrights All Right Reserved
 The views and opinions shared here are by the Author and are the property of Todos Escribe. 

Fast Food - Fishy Stuff

I recently heard that McDonald’s was changing its menu by adding a few new things and also getting rid of some things. According to news sources, “McDonald’s is getting rid of its Chicken Selects and Fruit & Walnut Salad and considering cutting Angus burgers as it tries to freshen up its menu with more limited-time items.” They also went on to say that, “They recently introduced Fish McBites and are planning a new McWrap chicken sandwich that will be larger than its Snack Wraps.”  I found this very interesting especially since I had just mentioned to a friend that McDonald’s really needed to consider reinventing their fish sandwich because it really was not appealing nor was it a great value for the price. While it’s not on their list of “to do’s” I do hope they get around to it.

Truth is if you are a vegetarian there are not a lot of choices out there in terms of fast food. Personally, I don’t really do fast food but there are times, not very often, when I am on the road and pressed for time so I choose to do fast food. So on those days when I need something quick and in a hurry and depending on where I am I may grab a fish sandwich from McDonald’s, Checkers, Burger King, or Wendy’s.  So far, Wendy’s has the best fish sandwich and McDonald’s the worst, based on my experience. If you have ever had a fish sandwich from McDonald’s you can attest to the fact that it is a skimpy fish filet on a plain bun with tartar sauce and a sprinkle of lettuce. It doesn't even look like the picture on the menu board. Of course you can always upgrade the sandwich by adding tomatoes and onions for an additional cost.  But even then it does not greatly improve the sandwich.

This week, on what turned out to be my first trip to McDonald’s this year, I opted to try the Fish McBites. They were actually pretty good but I don’t think I will be doing fast food again anytime soon. For starters I noticed that I get an upset stomach/heart burn after I ate fast food. I always thought that it was due to the fact that I didn't have a gallbladder anymore so my digestive system was a little off.  But then it dawned on me that perhaps the reason I ended up with an upset stomach/heart burn after consuming fish sandwiches from a fast food restaurant, especially Checkers, was because they probably fried their fish fillet in the same oil they fried their chicken and hamburgers in. While I have no real proof that is the case, it seems highly likely that it is true. Think about it – do you thing they have separate oil for frying fish and other meat products? I don’t think so. I can’t risk it anymore. So until I know for sure, I think I'll check out Subway. I’m just saying – I got issues. What about you?)i(

© Copyrights All Right Reserved
 The views and opinions shared here are by the Author and are the property of Todos Escribe. 

Relationship - The Quest Continues

I’m still hopeful that I will meet and marry the love of my life one day. In the meantime I’m still going through the elimination process. Just yesterday I was talking to a guy who was vying for my attention. He was trying to convince me to consider letting him into my world by telling me that he had always been attracted to me. Although I have known him since high school we had lost touch and only recently reconnected last month when I ran into him at a friend’s funeral.  As always, whenever a guy approaches me about being in my world I like to make sure that they are truly single and emotionally stable and emotionally available before I even think about taking them seriously. This time was no exception.  So when I asked him if he was single I was expecting a simple “yes” or “no”. However that was not what I got. What I got was, “yeah I’m single, but we going through some things.”  “Huh” I said out loud. “What does that mean? Either you’re in a relationship or you’re not.” He would try his best to clean that up but from what I gathered from his Freudian slip, he was still very much involved.

Although I have already made up my mind that he was not the one, I opted to keep the lines of communications open because that is my style. I don't just cut people off simply because there is no romantic interest. Besides there is no harm in remaining friends, which brings me back to the conversation we were having. During the conversation it became obvious to me that he had already made up his mind to keep pursuing me, despite my protest, with hopes that he could convenience me otherwise. What he does not know is once I make up my mind, there is no changing it. Not to toot my own horn or anything but, I already know that I am a desirable mate especially since I did my due diligence to use my past experiences as a learning tool/spring board to facilitate the qualities/attributes most men desire in a mate.   However, most men I meet do not possess the qualities I desire in a mate. Try as I might to spare his feelings he made me go there and I had to break it down to him using what little information I learned about him in the short period of time, as to why I would not be with him.

What I shared with him was this: I already know he does not possess the qualities I desire in a mate and the fact that he is still in a relationship only strengthens my case.  Even if he was not in a relationship I would still opt not to become involved with him. He exhibits classic/typical human behavior. Most people, when they see someone they are attracted to or want to be with, give little or no thought to whether or not they are compatible. They only think about what they want and the physical attraction or "lust" that they will no doubt convenience themselves later is love. That’s why most relationships don’t last past the physical. If you have a set of standards in place, i.e., things you want/expect in a relationship, coupled with your list of attributes you want your mate to possess, i.e., honesty, faithfulness – then you won’t settle for just anything that comes your way, especially if they don’t possess what you are looking for. You would also understand and accept the fact that you may not be what that person is looking for and won’t push the issue.  

The thing is most men are visual and I know you've heard me say that before, but I can’t overstate it enough because it is key to understanding my view on the subject. A man will see a woman he is physically attracted to and he will turn a deaf ear to her nagging or her resistance to his advances.  Or he could careless that she is already in a relationship because he wants her in his life. He gives no thought to the consequences of taking another man's woman or that she may just end up leaving him for another man should she decide to accept his advances.  Fact is he secretly hopes that she will only have eyes for him once they get involved. Likewise, a woman will see a man who does not possess all the attributes she is looking for but because he may have a good job, a nice home, and a nice car, she sees his potential to be the man she wants and so she gets involved with him because she feels she can groom him into the man she wants.

Both views are flawed and doomed to fail and I’ll tell you why. First off a good fulfilling relationship is based in part on compatibility. When two people are compatible there is a better chance that the issues that plague most relationship will be minimal. Secondly, people are who they are and don’t change especially when they get to be 40 plus. By the time they hit forty they are pretty much set in their ways and no amount of pushing is going to change them. So let’s say for instance, one of the things you want from your mate is that they be considerate of you, i.e., call when they are running late, check on you throughout the course of the day, or always tell you the truth about everything no matter what, but the person you are pursuing does none of those things no matter how many times you share with them how important those things are to you. Guess what? They ain't never going to do it because that is not who they are. People only change if they want to change. So the attributes or character flaws you are trying to instill/uproot in/out of them is futile if they don’t subscribe to the change them-self  If they care enough, they may try to change for you, but true to form they will revert back to their normal self because it is who they are. It’s why alcoholics and physical abusers make lousy mates – they don’t get help until they want to be helped no matter how well intended their spouse’s efforts. 

Then, unfortunately, there are those who will pretend to be what you are looking for because they desire to be with you. But again, like before, it will be short lived. So if the person you have your eyes on don't do the things you want or treat you the way you want to be treat from the word "go", it's not going to happen.  Quit wasting your time. It makes no sense to begin a relationship with someone you already know from the start that they are not a fit for you with the hopes that you can change them. If you do, you will end up resenting them and/or yourself for the duration of the relationship and sometime even after. Bottom-line is if you meet someone that does not possess the qualities, attributes or characteristics you desire in a mate, walk away. Nothing you do or say is going to make them change and you are signing up for months, if not years, of unhappiness.

So far, weeding out the counterfeits gets progressively easier every time for me because of the standards I have in place.  It doesn't happen very often, but there are times when it can be very difficult to walk away from someone because the physical/mental attraction is so strong and had I not have a system in place I probably would have ended up getting involved with them even though they don’t have the attributes or characteristics I desire. It never fails, after getting to know me guys are always asking if they can come to my house. Even if they never offer to take me out to dinner or a movie, they always ask if they can come to my house. So as a rule I never invite a guy to my house until I know for sure he is the one I want to be with. Okay, I must admit that this rule originally came about years ago more so as a protective mechanism because I did not want to expose my children to strange men more so than me weeding out unfit suitors.  But regardless of why I put it in place it has proven to be very effective and beneficial to me over the years. 

So far I have not had the pleasure of inviting a guy to my house since my divorce because guys don’t get it no matter how many ways I explain it to them and they usually lose interest, which I guess proves my point. They take it personal that I won't invite them over and may even become offended instead of trying to see it from my point of view. I can’t help but think that one of the things about me that is attractive to them – that I don’t let just any and anybody into my home – is the same thing that turns them away.  I just wish that they understood my position, but somehow I believe that when I run into the right guy he will not only respect my decision to not have him over until we are in a committed relationship but he will encourage it.  One guy that I really liked recently told me, “You've been over to my house 50 times, but I can’t even drive down your street.” He was exaggerating of course about the number of times I was over to his place, but I got his point. What he does not know is that his place is the only place I've spent any time at. Unfortunately, he was not willing to stay the course. Little does he know, he was so close to getting an invite. Oh well, next! I’m just saying – I got issues. What about you?)i(

© Copyrights All Right Reserved
 The views and opinions shared here are by the Author and are the property of Todos Escribe. 

Phone Etiquette - Still A Desirable Feature

As time changes, so do expectations and etiquette as it relates to a large spectrum of things including the telephone. Think about it – what was your experience like as far as using the telephone say, 40 years ago? For one thing there were only stationary phones so you were limited to location when placing and receiving calls.  Then there was no caller ID so there was no way to know who was calling you unless you actually answered the phone. Nor was there any call waiting. So if you were on the phone you would not know someone was trying to reach you and the person calling you would be greeted with a busy signal. Fact is the telephone as we know it has evolved over the years and now includes wireless/mobile ability.  Not only that, it now includes a lot of features that were not even imaginable let alone possible back then, i.e., call return, caller block, three-way calling, call forwarding, repeat dialing, etc. So it stands to reason that as things changed so would what is deemed acceptable as far as phone etiquette is concerned.

Keeping in mind that there are still people who do not have a mobile phone or any of the extra features mentioned above on their house phone, I still offer that for the mass majority phone etiquette is still warranted.  I say that because I have found that some people tend to be unconcerned with how they treat their callers. Either they have never been on the receiving end of the treatment that they themselves exhibit or they just have not given it any thought at all. Let’s say you are on a call and you receive another call. What would you do?  Most people will ask the first caller to hold on while they take the other call but they may or may not click back over in a timely manner. Personally I have a 60-second rule meaning I will hold on for as long as it takes for them to let the other caller know they are on another call and will call them back or for them to click back over and tell me they need to take that other call/need to call me back. 

Sometimes, depending on who the person is or how busy I am, I may give them a little more time to click back over but no more than three minutes, which is generous. Think about it – how much time do you need to tell someone you are on a call and need to call them back or to make a determination whether or not the nature of the call dictates that you take it?  Most times than not when you get a call you already know, based on who the caller is, whether or not you need to take that call right away. So if you are on the phone talking to your best friend and your doctor/boss calls in, why not tell your friend right then that you will call them back before you take the other call, especially since you don’t know how long that call may last? Better yet, if you are going to take another call, why not end the first call before clicking over?

I know that there are lots of reasons why people chose to take a call while on another call, but there is no reason to leave people holding on while you engage in another conversation. One of the most frustrating things for me, besides being cut off in the middle of my conversation, is being told to hold on mid-sentence while relaying a crucial situation only to have the person come back to say “I wish I didn't answer that call.” Or “I hate when people call trying to sell me stuff.” Are you kidding me? Surly you have caller ID but more importantly, you have voice-mail.  Don’t get me wrong – my frustration does not come from the fact that they clicked over to take another call but rather that they gave no consideration to me or who was calling before clicking over. 

When I am on a call I tend to give the person I am talking to my utmost respect and only take calls on a need to basis. So if I get a call while I’m on a call I check to see who is calling. If it’s one of my children or an expected call I tell the person I am speaking to that I have another call coming in and will call them back or talk to them later. If it’s not one of my children or a call I am expecting, I let the call go to voice-mail.  If I do decide to click over, I quickly find out the nature of the call and make a determination whether or not I need to end the previous call. Sometimes, if the nature of the call I am on is very important, I will let my children go to voice-mail and call them back when I get off the call. However, mobile phones now have options where you can send a text message to the caller if you chose not to take their call letting them know why you could not take their call, for example, “I’m on another call” or "I’m in a meeting.”  You can also include your intentions to return the call later if you chose to.  

While no one can dictate to you when and how to answer your phone - and I’m not trying to do that - there are some simple behaviors that are just necessary courtesies. For starters you should value your caller’s time. If you chose to take a call while on another call, be considerate and try to get back to them as soon as possible. If you find that the second call supersedes the first call then simply let the first caller know you have to call them back/you have to go. 

If you find that getting back to the first caller is virtually impossible because the nature of the second call dictates you stay on the line and the first caller subsequently hangs up because they could not wait indefinitely, be thoughtful and call them back with an apology.  Trust me, they will appreciate the gesture because nobody likes being kept on hold and I’m guessing not even you. I’m just saying – I got issues. What about you?)i(

© Copyrights All Right Reserved
 The views and opinions shared here are by the Author and are the property of Todos Escribe. 

House Guest or House Pest

At some point in our lives we have either entertained a house guest, been a house guest, or know of someone who was a house guest or had a house guest. It’s just something that happens in the course of life. There are lots of things that may foster the need to be a house guest or to have a house guest. For many, the desire to help someone who is down on their luck is the primary reason why they open their home to others, sometimes even to strangers. hen it does that may or maynot happen throughout the cousre  been a house guest, or know of someone who were at one point aBut what dictates how long they should stay and what are the expectations of them while they are there? Unlike the movie Houseguest starring Sinbad, having house guests can be no laughing matter.

Back in 1995 after being turned down for a promotion on my job and unable to make ends meet with my salary, I started entertaining the idea of leaving my native island and branching out to the mainland. I was not sure what I would encounter but felt sure it had to be better than what I was experiencing. So I contacted a couple in Atlanta that I had met and befriended while they were on the island. The wife was very understanding to my plight and responded positively to my request to visit Atlanta to see if I could find gainful employment. I ended up interviewing and getting a position at her company and subsequently moved my family to Atlanta. Naturally when we got here we stayed with the couple. As far as I can remember there was no real discussion about how long I could stay with them short of “until you get on your feet.” When I asked if I can help pay for anything I was told to save my earnings to help get settled.    

I would end up spending almost two months with that couple. The experience itself was more than I had expected. They opened their home to us and made us feel welcomed. Not only did they open their home to me and my two children, they provided a vehicle for us to get around and also showed me the ropes about stateside living, i.e., finding a daycare for my son, best route to take to get to and from work after dropping off/picking up my son by avoiding highways as I had no experience driving on multi-lane highways. I remember that the husband was very concerned with my not getting lost and provided me with a map book and showed me how to read it. They were great. They made my first experience as a house guest very memorable. I did my best to pull my weight even though they did not ask for any compensation for me staying with them. I did what I could to compensate in my own way, i.e., doing the dishes, routine house cleaning, etc. I also did not want to take advantage of them, so I was determined to find an apartment and a car of my own. I had a lot of anxiety about moving too far away from the couple as I didn't know any place else and was a bit scared about being on my own. After all I had never lived any place else except my small island and everything now was so unfamiliar.

As with anything else, living with people have its challenges, so we did have our share of disagreements, i.e., my parenting style, my decision to do laundry instead of joining them for dinner, etc. No matter how well intended, it is inevitable that the day will come when you have outstayed your welcome. I remember it like it was just yesterday – it was a cold Sunday morning in mid February when the wife came to the door of the room I shared with my children and asked me what my plans were for the day. I told her that I didn't have any and she said, “You need to find some place to go because I need to spend some time with my husband.” Looking back I can see how that was a fair request, after all it was just the two of them and their two cats before I came along with my two children. Despite their big hearts, the need for quality time alone became a necessity. So without thought of where we would go, we got dressed and got in the car with no destination in mind. I remember driving around for hours feeling so misplaced and eventually pulling into a parking lot where I had a meltdown. It was there that my situation hit me and I was forced to reflect on what I had done. I had moved my children to an unfamiliar place with no family support and I was scared. I knew I needed to find a place and I needed to find it quick. So I dried my eyes and went looking for an apartment. I ended up signing a lease at the first place I saw. The next weekend I went looking for a car. By the first week in March we were in our very own apartment, furniture and all. 

Since then I have heard horror stories from both sides of the spectrum about the difficulties of house guests. There are those who move in with no real plan in place as to how long they will stay or what compensation, if any, they will provide/expect. For some, they believe that the mere fact that they are staying with a family member entitles them to freeload with no intentions to help out or offer compensation – monetary or otherwise. Not only that, they don’t clean up after themselves or anyone else for that matter, they eat without replacing what they ate, and may even develop an attitude when asked to help out from time to time. Then there are others for who being a house guest mean just that – a house guest – with no responsibilities at all.  Basically they feel it is okay for them to run up the utilities, eat whatever they want, take long showers, and enjoy all the amenities in the  home without thought or consideration of how it's getting paid or how it affects the host. If left unchecked these actions can foster resentment and cripple a friendship/relationship.

There are lots of reasons why someone may need a place to stay - hopefully short-term - however it is never okay to take advantage. I am willing to grant it that some people may not have any previous experience about being a house guest and may not have any idea of what is considered fair when placed in that situation. But there are those who knowingly set out to get over. In any case it is wise to have some rules or plans in place in the event you find yourself on the host end. First have a clear understanding of exactly how long they intend to stay. This will help you gauge whether or not it is a time frame that works for you. If it is longer than you know you can stomach, then please by all means let them know and gracefully decline. Next, have a clear understanding of what compensation you expect from them for the duration of their stay. This may be in the form of monetary compensation, chores, or a combination of both. Then you want to share your house rules in no uncertain terms, i.e., coming and going, food consumption, cleaning up after themselves, privacy, smoking/non-smoking expectation, etc. Finally you want to have an out clause meaning should things not work out before the expected end date that you can and will ask them to leave. With that being said, monitor the situation every day and speak openly about what is not working to give your house guest an opportunity to correct the behavior.

As a house guest you also have the responsibility to do your part when staying with someone. Be considerate and respectful of your host realizing that they are doing you a favor by allowing you to stay in their home. Their house is not a hotel so do your due diligent and clean up after yourself and monitor utility/water usage. And above all, don’t overstay your welcome, regardless of your reasons for needing a place to stay. Try to get out as quickly as possible. Put yourself in their shoes and act accordingly. Looking back on my own experience I see where I had let fear keep me from doing what needed to be done. There is no telling how long I would have stayed with that couple had the wife not made that comment. I may never know exactly when my stay became an issue or just how they really felt about the time I spent in their home as they showed me nothing but kindness during my stay and never once did either of them made me feel uncomfortable even during our times of disagreements. 

Truth is, had it not been for the generosity shown to me by that couple I would not have been able to successfully move my family into an apartment and secure a vehicle as easily as I did - I am forever grateful.  It’s been 17 years now, but that was the first and only time I stayed with anyone since I left my mother’s house. I have, however opened my home to many since then. It is said that when it comes to house guest, two weeks is the maximum time allowed before it is considered that they have overstayed their welcome. Some say three days. I saw a plaque once over a door that read, “Jesus was out in three days.” I’m just saying – I got issues. What about you?)i(

© Copyrights All Right Reserved
 The views and opinions shared here are by the Author and are the property of Todos Escribe. 

Legalize It

Never thought I would live to see the day when Cannabis/marijuana, also known as hemp, weed, joint, blunt, duchy, pot, grass, reefer, tampee, sensee melia, or ganja, would be legal. I grew up in an era where I was ignorant to the fact that it was illegal to possess marijuana never mind smoke it. Not that I have ever smoked it - well there was that one time I tried to but ended up coughing up a storm - so not funny. Guess I swallowed when I should have exhaled. Either way, it ended up on my “least liked things to do” list just above smoking cigarettes. The thing is, back then it seems as if just about everyone smoked it and nobody was tripping over what it did or didn't do. On any given day you could walk through the projects (Chabert, Red Brick, Kennedy, Auro Diaz) and observe guys hanging out on the corner puffing and passing a joint. Sooner or later someone would come by asking if anybody had any funta or grabber. Funta/grabber is home grown tobacco which was used to lace the marijuana joint to reduce coughing and to enhance/increase the length of the high (I guess my sample didn't have any in it, thus the coughing). 

Ordinarily marijuana burns quickly and the smoke is very light so the high gained from it is over before you had a chance to enjoy it. By adding funta you create a slow burning blend which enhances and prolongs the effects of the high. 

Marijuana is a natural herb that grows wild in some places and harvest for its healing properties. Rastafarians use it as a part of their meditation ritual. For years people who used marijuana and knew of its healing properties begged the powers that be to legalize it so that they could indulge in it freely without the stress of being hauled off to jail for having less than an ounce in their possession. Even renowned reggae artist Bob Marley (and later Peter Tosh) released a song about it back in 1976 called simply - Legalize it! Some of his lyrics claim that doctors, nurses, lawyers, and judges smoked it – I can believe that. He also claimed that it was good for the flu, asthma, and tuberculosis and even something called Numara Thrombosis, whatever that is.  I couldn't find the meaning for numara but I learned that Thrombosis is the formation of a blood clot inside a blood vessel, obstructing the flow of blood through the circulatory system. So with the calming effect that comes from smoking marijuana I can see how that would work. Bob goes on to say that even birds, ants, fowls/chicken, and goat eat and love this plant. There were no “food administration” when my grandparents were growing up –  for that matter there was none around in our earlier ancestors’ time either. So according to my paternal grandfather, the animals were their official food administration. He said, “If the goat eat it and lived, then it’s good for human consumption.”

This highly controversial dispute over whether or not to legalize marijuana has been on-going for decades. The arguments presented on either side can be very compelling. For some it’s all about the revenue marijuana sales generates. They believe that keeping a ban on the use of marijuana is a coordinated effort by very powerful men who use the government to help regulate the revenue it generates. If everyone is able to grow their own marijuana in their backyard like tomato patches, then there would be no profit in it. They equate marijuana to tobacco in that they both are derived from nature in the form of a plant and while tobacco is “big business” because it is harvest and packaged by a handful of companies who control that revenue, marijuana can eventually be harvested and packed the same way. But by keeping it illegal, it forces people to operate in much the same way they did when alcohol was illegal. There is more money to be made on a banned substance than there is on the legal stuff, especially when the suppliers are few.

Then there are those like John Walters, Director of the Office of National Drug Control Policy who argues that there are properties in marijuana which makes it unsafe for human consumption. They claim that it is highly addictive, and among other things increases heart rate, and according to Director Walters, it “damages the brain, heart, lungs, and immune system. That it also "impairs learning and interferes with memory, perception, and judgment.” Oh and my personal favorite, “Smoked marijuana contains cancer-causing compounds…." Hello, so does smoking cigarettes! Opps I’m sorry. I forgot I’m suppose to be providing unbiased reporting here – lol.  Okay, where was I again? Oh yeah – marijuana is bad for you. Yeah, right. I saw literally lots of people indulging in smoking pot over the years and they are no worse for wear. Sure some of them are dead now but it had nothing to do with smoking pot, trust me. The worst side effect I saw was increased hunger and mellowness. I never witnessed anyone doing half the crap that a person loaded on alcohol or prescription drug do, i.e., crash a car, picked a fight, pull a gun, etc. Besides, have you seen some of those commercials for prescription drugs? The side effects are ten times worse than the illness it is suppose to help alleviate and in some cases can literally kill you.  Truth is, smoking marijuana is a lot less harmful than say smoking cigarettes. It is little known fact that cigarettes manufactures add stuff/chemicals to the tobacco that not only make them very addictive but also very harmful to your health.  Have you seen all the new cigarette warning commercials lately? It's enough to make you want to quite smoking - if you can.  Anyway, for all intent and purposes, there are tons of reasons why marijuana should be legalized and just as much reasons why it should not.

So after years of being on the “banned or control substance” list which resulted in countless people being prosecuted for indulging in this favorite American pass time – I say that jokingly of course, but true none the less – we have the beginning of what many felt was inevitable. Marijuana is now being more accepted as a formal form of treatment for a range of health conditions across the country. First out the gate was California, who broke away from the pack in 1996 by legalizing it for medicinal purposes.  Over the next 16 years the following 18 states made their mark by voting to legalize it for medicinal purposes as well: Alaska, Arizona, Colorado, Connecticut, District of Columbia (DC), Delaware, Hawaii, Maine, Massachusetts, Michigan, Montana, Nevada, New Jersey, New Mexico, Oregon, Rhode Island, Vermont, and Washington. Colorado and Washington are the first states to approve the legalize non-medical use of marijuana. It is important to note that each state has different rules and regulations/laws that govern the possession and use of this once controlled substance. And while the following eight states have pending legislation to do the same, they would do good to take heed of the federal issues hovering over this brave act: Illinois, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Maryland, New Hampshire, New York, and Oklahoma. For starters, while marijuana may be legal in the aforementioned states, under federal law, it is still illegal to possess, use, buy, sell, or cultivate marijuana for recreational use. There have been reduced instances of individual persecution in those states where it has been legalized for medicinal use because of the revised laws, but for those people who are “professional traffickers”, not so much. There are rules and regulations in place to govern the handful of approved growers of marijuana for medicinal use and they are being monitored discreetly to ensure compliance. Side bar: For the record, I'm not convinced that these "authorized growers" and "producers" are keeping the cannabis at it's natural properties. I've seen ads and commercials where they are offering a variety of flavors and strains. Seems like somebody's playing God and adding stuff to the mix. It's those "additives" that can potentially muddy the waters and give the impression that cannabis is not healthy for human consumption. Yes, mass production by companies could very well end up like the tobacco industry - where we now have a tainted product.

So when posed with the question of whether or not I am for or against the legalization of marijuana, I say legalize it! By so doing we begin the process of eliminating the grip the illegal trade has had on this country for years and reduces the crimes that come with it.  Not only that, legalization would also ensure that the product does not get contaminated with chemicals or such delights as everyone who chooses can grow their own thus ensuring it keeps it original natural properties. We will gain a valuable tax-source as well as reduce the cost associated with policing this now illegal activity.  As more states opt to legalize marijuana, I can’t help but wonder what repercussion this is going to have on the rest of the country/world who still have bans on it.  Who knows when or if all of America will embrace lifting the ban off this substance allowing it to be used for whatever purpose - be it medicinal or recreational. But for now I know there are some happy people out there who will gladly drive across state lines if for no other reason but for the opportunity to be able to indulge in a spliff without the fear of being caught, imprisoned, or worst. Just because I don’t smoke don’t mean you can’t. Enjoy! I’m just saying – I got issues. What about you?)i(

© Copyrights All Right Reserved
 The views and opinions shared here are by the Author and are the property of Todos Escribe.