I Don’t Want to Be Tolerated

For a very long time, I thought I needed a relationship to complete me. I thought being in a relationship meant I would feel valued, loved, and supported.

But what I learned was that I could be in a relationship and still feel completely alone.

I was still dealing with life's challenges on my own. When my car needed attention, I handled it. When it needed gas, maintenance, or washing, I handled it. When the grass needed cutting, I handled it. And while I was handling all of that, I was also cooking, cleaning, giving, nurturing, and catering to someone else's needs.

I was exhausting myself trying to be everything for somebody else, while wondering who was making sure I was okay.

And that realization changed something in me.

I don't want a relationship where I am constantly giving and carrying the load while the other person simply receives. I want a partner. Someone who understands that life is a two-way street. Someone who is willing to share the load, offer support, show up, and genuinely care about what I'm carrying too.

I want to feel appreciated, not tolerated.

I've also learned that attraction and chemistry are wonderful, but they aren't enough to build a lasting relationship. I want to know who you are beyond what you find physically attractive about me. What are your values? What matters to you? How do you communicate? How do you treat people? What do you bring to a relationship besides your physical presence?

And there is another thing I will not compromise: my core beliefs.

My spiritual understanding and consciousness have evolved through years of questioning, learning, experiencing, and having truths revealed to me along my journey. My relationship with God, the Universe, and my understanding of who I am are deeply important to me.

I don't expect another person to have every answer I have or to experience spirituality exactly the way I do. But I do need someone who can respect my beliefs, honor my consciousness, and allow me to walk my spiritual path without trying to pull me away from it.

I have worked too hard to find my peace and understand myself to compromise the very things that have helped me become the woman I am today.

And I'm not in a rush to jump into bed just because there is attraction.

I don't need to sleep with you to show you that I care about you. I want the opportunity to build something first. Let's talk. Let's spend time together. Let's learn each other. Let's see whether there is a foundation strong enough to support something meaningful.

It might take six months. It might take a year. Maybe longer. I'm not putting a deadline on getting to know someone. I'm putting value on the process.

For a long time, I neglected myself because I didn't know any better. I grew up learning to figure things out through experience, and some of those experiences taught me to give more than I received. Over time, my heart became guarded.

But now I'm learning something different.

I am learning to love myself. I'm learning to protect my peace. I'm learning that being single does not mean I'm incomplete, and being in a relationship does not automatically mean I'm loved.

I don't need someone to complete me.

I want someone who complements the woman I've already become.

Someone who can meet me where I am—not just physically, but emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

Someone who understands that friendship is a two-way street. You don't get to say you're looking for a friend and then use that friendship as a place to dump all of your problems without ever asking how I'm doing.

I have peace in my life now, and I'm not willing to trade that peace for a relationship just because I don't want to be alone.

I'd rather be alone and whole than partnered and exhausted.

I'd rather wait for something meaningful than settle for something that only looks good on the surface.

Because I don't want to be tolerated.

I want to be loved. I want to be appreciated. I want to be supported. I want to be respected. And I want to be chosen just as intentionally as I choose.

I'm just saying, #Igotissues. What about you? 🦋

#Love #Relationships #SelfLove #Peace #PersonalGrowth #Dating #KnowYourWorth #HealthyRelationships #SpiritualGrowth #Consciousness #Igotissues